Favorite Photos of January

Me, Maggie, Michelle 

Sarah and Me 

Molly, Sarah, Maggie, Me, and Michelle

 Me and Emily 

Courtney, Dan, Me, Nikki, Brittany, Chad, Tom, and Sarah 

Lori, Me, Martha, and Brittany

Looking back now, I realized how important relationships have been this month.  I've been trying hard to  work on this, and it makes such a difference to be intentional about working on my relationships.  I honestly remember moments because of the people I spent them with.  I want to keep doing this.  I want to keep building relationships.  

"cause that’s what life's about. it's about the times where you lay in the grass next to someone you love. it's about the color of the sky, it's about a roaring fire on a winter eve. everybody hurts, everybody bleeds. everyone laughs & smiles & loves. & that's all that it is. there's no meaning of life, it's nothing that can be defined. it's a matter of writing your own definition."

Day 3: "So what sessions did you go to? Oh, the diet coke one?"

"Lasts" are always hard for me.  I woke up this morning and was really sad because I knew that today was my last day here.  This has been such a great experience, and I did not want to even think about leaving.

After breakfast, we had optional sessions to attend, and it was the sort of move-at-your-own-pace thing.  Unfortunately, I had to pack up my bags and check out of the room, so I couldn't go to the sessions right away.  When I was done, I only had about 30 minutes left before club, so I decided I'd go take a walk to McDonald's to get Diet Coke, and spend some time with God just walking.  I'm hardly out of the parking lot when Dan comes driving up the road in Tom's car, just staring at me like I'm an idiot.  So he stops, takes me to get my Diet Coke fix, and then we explored early-morning Madison and talked about Young Life.  He's put so much work into getting YL to DSM, and you can tell by being around him how passionate and excited he is for all of this to finally be coming together.

The last club was perf.  We sang two of my favorite chapel songs from Camp Tecumseh, "Mighty to Save" and "Light the Fire."  It was like bringing together two different parts of God in my life.  Ash's parting wisdom was to leave this place with an unmistakable identity.  That when someone would see you, they would know right away that you are a son or daughter of Jesus Christ.  I left the conference feeling like I was radiating Jesus' love everywhere.  I was so refreshed and renewed and felt so alive and ready to tackle life.

I love Young Life.

Day 2: overdosed on diet coke and Young Life

I wish I could start off every day of my life with club.  It just puts me in the greatest mood and allows me to  start my day with God and invite Him into my life.  I'm so excited to have chapel every single morning this summer.

I liked club this morning because we sang "If We Are the Body" and Ash talked about unconventional love.  He talked about how love is proof of the reception of forgiveness, and that a leader should always exude love, especially towards the kids.  I love kids.  If I had all the time in the world, I'd love to become super involved in a youth group, young life, high school, and everything else here and work and hang out with kids all day long.  Ash's entire message just hit home.  I felt like he was looking at me and talking to me the entire time; almost as if nobody else was even there.

After club, Brittany, Nikki, Sarah, and I went to a breakout session geared towards first time leaders.  The speakers talked about the things that get in the way/make it difficult to be a leader.  But the best part was when everybody came up with twice as many reasons to be a leader than excuses not to be.

The speaker in the next session I attended talked about how infinite God's grace really is and how to follow Jesus with a childlike faith.  He showed this video and I smiled so big the entire time.

We had free time tonight, so we decided we'd all go downtown Madison with Martha and Lori from Fort Dodge, IA and walk around and eat.  The capital is really pretty.

Our evening consisted of being turned down by multiple restaurants for having such a large group, remote control car starters, 60 mph in a 30, sneak attack snowball fights, GPS, and then sprinting through the hotel to get to club on time.  No worries, the speeding and sprinting paid off because we got third row seats at club.

My favorite quotes from club tonight:

"This is Young Life.  Our message is Jesus.  Our method is relationships."

"Be extravagant lovers of Jesus Christ."

"What's your cross to bear?"

"This is God's story that He's allowing you to be a part of."

I can't really describe what happened at club tonight, but God touched my heart.  I have never felt so connected in my entire life; it was one of the greatest experiences of my life.  At that moment, I knew without a doubt that this was where I was meant to be.  It was no accident that I attended this conference with these people.  It is not by chance that these amazing people were the ones I shared it with.  I am joining the Young Life Des Moines team, and I could not be any happier.  These people are my family.  I love and trust and admire and care about them so much, it's bordering on crazy.  They all are so passionate and dedicated to Young Life, and I feel so honored to have the opportunity to join their team. I was talking to one of my friends the other day and we came to the conclusion that friendships where Christ is present are always the ones to last longer and be stronger and develop quicker.  That's really the reason why these people feel like family to me.

After club, we all hung out and played games: Mad Gab with French accents, team Catch Phrase, and Catch Phrase without talking.  Obvi, Catch Phrase without talking was the biggest hit.  People were running into walls, on their hands and knees eating the carpet, dancing like fairies, and understandably getting way too competitive.  Then we showed the Marriott that at DSM Young Life, we make it rain... rain playing cards.  I wish I'd gotten a picture.  Afterwards, Brittany and I got to chat for a while, and I am so thankful that Young Life brought us together.  I'm so excited for us to be friends and take everything we learned this weekend and change kids lives.

Day 1: "she didn't say a word the whole way, and now she's jumping all over the place"

I love Young Life.

Young Life and I go way back, but basically I have a lot to thank Summer Sletten for.

This weekend I had the most amazing opportunity to go to Madison, WI for a Young Life Mission Community Conference with six other people who are beyond passionate about starting Young Life in Des Moines.  I had never met any of these people before, yet I was not the least bit nervous.

I was quiet for the majority of the ride there and it took me time to warm up, but once we got to the conference and were waiting for club, I was going crazy and jumping around everywhere.  I hadn't had club for about 7 months, and I hope I never have to go that long without club again.

Club was fabulous.  It just feels so right for me to be there.  I love scenes like this.

Something about hundreds of people all together to praise God just blows my mind.  It's such a powerful experience for me, and gives me so much joy.  Mike "Ash" Ashburn was the speaker, and he is hands down one of the best speakers I have ever had the privilege to hear.  He is encouraging, inspiring, and gives his heart and soul to the ministries of Young Life.  In his message, he encouraged every leader to get in the game; that God wants to live life in your game uniform.  He is one of those speakers that hooks you and reels you in before he really even says anything.  It's just amazing.

At this point, I don't really know what to do.  I am so booked up with credits this semester and Delta Gamma obligations and my circle of friends at Drake already, that I am not totally sure that I have the time necessary to give to this ministry.  I love Young Life, but I just keep questioning if being a leader is something that I am really supposed to do, and whether or not it is something that I am qualified for and that God wants me to do.  I know that I just need to keep praying about it, but decisions like this just eat me up inside.

Other great things about today:
1.  Playing Mad Gab with Chad, Sarah, and Brittany
2.  Getting to see Molly

3.  This quote from Caitlin Higgins:

"I think for the most part, 

if you're really honest with what you want out of life, 

life will give it to you."

4.  Meeting new people (in order of when I met them): Brittany, Dan, Chad, Tom, Nikki, and Sarah

making time

I am way too stressed for this point in the semester.  It's probably the fact that I am taking far too many credit hours, but it's still awful.  I feel like all I do is go to class, eat, and do homework.  

Today I had an exceptionally long list of things to get done before this weekend, so the stress level was up even higher.  I got back after my last class today and sat down at my desk to do homework and was greeted by a Skype chat from my friend Hadley.  I really did not have the time to talk, but I love her and we had a few things to catch up on, so I decided we could talk for ten minutes, then I'd get started on homework.  We got to talking about blogs and quotes and inspiration and Taylor Swift, all which led to talking about Stronghold.  Stronghold is our youth group's annual retreat, and this year will be the first year in a while that I will not be able to go.  It is so hard on me to not be there to see my friends be senior leaders and see the amazing things I know they'll do, and more than anything I just want to be there to support them.  

Hadley and I were talking about her role as a junior at Stronghold.  She said, "I'm so scared for this years stronghold. like i cant even start thinking about it because last year i lost my role model."  Broke my heart.  I love this girl to death, and so badly wish I could be there for her.  But I've realized that my time in youth group has passed, and the way that I can be there for Hadley is to make time for her.  I could have told her that I had homework to do, but instead I happened to make a good decision and talked with her for three hours.  

I want this to be part of my definition.  I want to be there for people at all times, especially when it's not convenient for me.  I do not want to make excuses, I just want to be there.  I want to make time for relationships and important things in my life.  

Church Search: First Federated Church

One of my goals this semester besides school related things is to find a church in Des Moines that I like and  would be proud to call my church away from home.  I'm not really sure what I'm looking for at all, but I'm trying to keep an open mind and just see where God leads me.  What I really want is for my church in Peoria to be picked up and placed in Des Moines.  Which, crazy enough, is why I chose my first church to try.  First Federated Church in Des Moines coincidentally has the same name as the church I belong to in Peoria (First Federated Church of Peoria).

So I went to the 8:30 service this morning.  I liked the pastor and the message and the way they projected Bible verses and song lyrics onto screens at the front of the room.  I didn't particularly enjoy the songs they sang, which was a real bummer because music is a huge part how I worship.  Not that I was expecting it, but it was definitely nothing like my church in Peoria.

I know that this church search will take time, but I really just want to find a church I love.  Right now.  Patience is difficult.

"well that only took four hours..."

Tonight Melanie, Elissa, Katie, Bianca, and I all went out for dinner for Katie's birthday, which was during winter break.  We drove all around West Des Moines looking for somewhere to eat, put our name in at 2 places, drove off with one reservation buzzer, almost died sliding on icy roads, we ended up at Olive Garden.  We ended up waiting for over an hour because apparently everybody goes out to dinner on Saturday nights... who knew.

The wait was totally worth it.  We all scrunched in around a four-person table, almost had drinks and meals spilled on us, ate four baskets of breadsticks and two giant bowls of salad, and sang happy birthday to Katie extremely obnoxiously.

Although it was Katie's birthday, Melanie was the star of the night.  Her voice is just naturally at a level higher than most people's, so when she was telling a story of a girl who had no deodorant on, everyone looked over toward our table, thinking she was talking about herself.  Then she told us about her childhood when she and her siblings would take fake grapes and suction them to their faces and pretend they were nasty moles.  She was so surprised that none of us had done that before and that we were all laughing hysterically about it.

I love these girls.  I love that I can be myself completely around them, and THAT is why they love me.  You don't get that a lot, and I am so blessed to have gotten this lucky so quickly at Drake.

"It's like P90X for your faith!"

I love music.  I love my friends.  I love God.  I love cheap things.
Winter Jam was a perfect combination of these four things.
I paid ten dollars to see nine Christian artists and bands perform for almost four hours with a great group of my friends.  I love worship music and this night was exactly what I needed.  There were so many people at Winter Jam, which made me so happy.  Wells Fargo Arena was jam packed.  I was thankful Niki got there early and saved seats for the rest of us.  I loved seeing all these people packed into one place, all there to praise God.

Tony Nolan was the speaker for the event.  Even though I've heard him twice before, he has such an amazing life story and testimony that it blows my mind every time.

The David Crowder Band has such an amazing voice live.  I'd love to see one of their full concerts.  Their songs are so pure and simple and true, which is what makes them so great, in my opinion.  Plus I just really like lead singer's mini-fro and crazy beard.

The Newsboys are probably the greatest performers that I have ever seen.  They put on such a show, but their music is still so amazing.  The lead singer was raised straight up on some crazy platform about 40 feet above the crowd, while the two back up singers/musicians were moving around in the air over the crowd on these sort of mechanical arm contraptions.  And although the picture doesn't show it, the drummer and his entire drum set was elevated and spinning in the background.  So crazy.  Crazy good.

Emily, I know you're creeping on me...

"reunited and it feels so good... we should listen to that song later"

I loved coming back to Drake today and walking into my dorm and being so excited to see all of my friends.  They all make me real happy.  We all have so many stories to tell about everything we did during the month that we were apart.  I'm really excited to see all of these wonderful girls every day again.  They are kind, caring, spunky, lovely, hilarious, genuine, and happy girls that I am so blessed to call my friends.
Niki is hilarious but so real, which I love about her.  Melanie is so classy and always researching our next outing.  Katie is down to earth and chill and smiley.  Yvette is always willing to help and is so caring.  Elissa constantly happy and always true to herself, which I admire her for.  Bianca and I developed one of the deepest friendships I have in such a little amount of time, and I'm thankful for that.
As I continue on this journey trying to define my life, I hope each of these girls will stick by me because I know that I have so much to learn from them all.  I want to keep them in my life, even when we're not living on the same floor.

Taylor Swift and freezing rain

This morning I woke up at the crack of dawn, showered, ate an amazing breakfast my mommy made, and hopped in the car to journey back to Drake.  Classes start tomorrow, and I'd been back for a month and three days, so it was basically time to go.
Obviously, since I had a four hour drive west to Des Moines, there was a huge winter weather storm moving east.  Perfect.  At first, the weather was fine, and dare I say, it was somewhat sunny.  But my luck quickly changed.  I drove through snow, ice, freezing rain, "wintry mix" as the weather channel would call it, and then just plain rain.  It was so gross and dangerous.  Cars were off the road left and right, and this semi truck went off the road not much before I passed.  That's so not a normal angle...

It slowed traffic so much that I went about a half mile in a half hour.  So brutal.  Everyone was practically in park in the left lane.  So naturally, I jammed to Taylor Swift to pass the time.  I made it through all of the T. Swift on my iPod once, and had to start over.  I usually love driving by myself, but today I kept wishing that someone could just be with me.  The icy roads made me nervous that I'd slide off like everyone else.  But God was with me.  I knew he was there.  He's the only reason why I made it safely to Drake, even if the drive was way longer than it should have been, and I'm thankful for that.

National Friendship Bracelet Day!

January 13th.  Every year.  National friendship bracelet day.  Remember it.

So today I rocked my new FBC sweatshirt all day.  It was an awesome day.  I made lunch in my FBC sweatshirt, picked Michelle up from school in my FBC sweatshirt,

gave Michelle a friendship bracelet in my FBC sweatshirt, 

adventured to McDonalds, Target, the library, and the quilting store with Michelle in our FBC sweatshirts, failed to find the candy store in our FBC sweatshirts, got stared at by crazy people because we were wearing the same FBC sweatshirts,

went to dinner with Michelle and Marlin in my FBC sweatshirt, 

had a crazy wonderful hilarious waitress at Olive Garden who loved my FBC sweatshirt (she's in the back...),

and basically just had a great day with my sister in our FBC sweatshirts.

a year and a half later...

Summer of 2009.
It was the summer before my senior year, the second summer that I wouldn't be at Camp Tecumseh, and the first summer that my friends from Camp would be working on staff.  To make matters worse, Michelle was going for two weeks, which left me home alone for two weeks, while so many people I cared about were having the time of their life at the best place on earth.  So I decided to do something to keep my mind off of things and keep myself busy.  I wish I could remember what made me decide on this, but I decided to make a quilt.  This is what it looked like in August 2009.

It also looked like that until Christmas break of the same year when I made slight progress.  I pulled all of my materials out again this past summer and actually made significant progress.  I took the fabric squares and stitched them together so that there were only four separate pieces of fabric.  But then I had to go to college, which made sewing difficult.  Actually, it became totally impossible because Drake does not provide their students with a sewing machine in their dorm.

So when I was back home for a month and four days, after three weeks I remembered this quilt.  So I went at it one day, and finished the entire front side.  Then I needed to figure out how to make this "sheet" (for lack of a better word) into an actual quilt.  My mom helped me out and introduced me to one of her ex-co-workers' wife, Val, who is a master quilter.  Val is so knowledgeable when it comes to quilts and she was so eager to help me, which I loved.  So I went over to her home on Saturday, and she helped me figure out that I needed a border, a back side, how to "stitch in the ditch," what quilter's pins are, and that binding is essential.  I went back to her house this morning, after doing hours of work at home since Saturday, and she helped me do all the binding and finish my quilt.

It's so amazing and I feel so accomplished and I actually really like it and I think it's pretty impressive for the first quilt I've ever made.  Ever.  I'm so thankful that Val was so willing to help me and had so much wisdom to impart to me.

When I was getting ready to leave she said, "I'm so glad you let me help you and teach you what I know.  It's important for us quilters to pass on our knowledge to younger generations in order to keep the craft alive." I didn't think anything of it... until I was driving home.  By saying this, Val made me realize that I need to think about what I want to pass on to younger people.  I need to think about and figure out what I'm going to be passionate about and what I want to share with other people.  I think I want my life to be an example.

ten things i need to work on

1.  not procrastinating
2.  trusting
3.  my relationship with God
4.  being outgoing
5.  taking initiative
6.  serving God
7.  figuring out what to do with my life
8.  living in the moment
9.  being less judgmental
10.  sharing

I have practically mastered the art of procrastination.  It's ridiculous and it has started to affect my life in serious ways, and I don't like that.  So I'm trying to change.

I have troubles trusting people, but I am not really sure as to why.  I want to change that.

I always work on my relationship with God, but I think that it sometimes gets bumped down on my priority list.  I want that to change.

I am not an outgoing person. At all.  I never have been.  But I want to work on taking the initiative to break out of my shell and change and be the outgoing person that I think I can be.

I love serving God.  Everything about it is so great.  I want to keep doing that.  It was a struggle this past semester being away from home and my normal routine, but I can't use that excuse anymore.  I need to challenge myself to find opportunities in Des Moines.  Maybe Young Life will actually happen in DSM and so much of this would change.

I wish I could say that without a doubt I know that I am going to be a pharmacist when I (hopefully) graduate in 5.5 years, but that's so unrealistic.  I have no idea.  I mean, I'm strangely good at chemistry and I like it, which is also strange, but is that what I want my life to be about?  If I want my life to be about God, should I be a pharmacist? can I still be a pharmacist? should I change majors?

I'm always planning.  My goal is to change that, and just live in the now.  Enjoy the moment.  Stop and smell the roses.

I hate being judgmental.  Hate it.  I still want to hate it just as much, but I want to change how I view others.

I want to share my life and my experiences and my stories and my mistakes and my lessons with other people.  I want to share my blog with other people.  I want to stop keeping everything so secretive and open up for a change.

attitude.

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."
"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude." 
"Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude."


I hate it when I have a bad attitude.  It's always just one thing that makes me upset, and then I get stuck in this sort of funk.  Everything just sucks.  I hate when this happens.  I don't like who I am when I'm upset.  Tonight I missed so many great opportunities.  I had a bad attitude and was so set on just getting out of the situation that I passed up three people that I've been trying to see since October.  
The worst part is, after I calmed down, I thought back and realized that I was the one holding me back.  I control my attitude; nobody else does.  This is so not who I want to be.  I don't like it when petty little things rub me the wrong way, and then ruin the rest of my day.  I want this:  "I want to choose to be happy and choose to be positive and choose to be patient and choose to make this the fun part. Everyday we get to choose."


"Choosing to be positive and having a grateful attitude is going to determine how you're going to live your life."

6 reasons why today was spectacular

1.  Maggie Shadid got hired for CTDC.  Yay :) I love when people I love are happy.  Maggie is so ready for this and she's gonna be a rockstar for sure.  Plus, this means we get to spend time together at Tecumseh this summer. Best thing ever.

2.  I got to play with (babysit) Elle and Matthew.  These kids are adorable and such fun.  Kids bring such joy to my life.  They are just always so carefree, and it's such a change from my daily life to be around kids like that.  This sign in Elle's room says it all.  So true.

3.  Elle calls me "Sarah Mooney."  All the time.  Seriously.  Even when it's completely unnecessary, like when we're playing a game, she'll say, "Sarah Mooney, is it my turn?" or "Sarah Mooney, can I have some orange juice?"  She's so presh.

4.  My biology grade from fall semester got rounded up.  Awesome.  Grades are super important to me, and even though I have absolutely no idea why it got changed, I'm not asking any questions.  Just thanking God for that blessing.

5.  As a direct result of number four, I made the Dean's List at Drake.  I'm so pumped because according to my mom, "This is a big deal, Sarah!"  And yes, grades are a big deal to me, and I'm so excited about this.  I worked my butt of this semester, so this is reward is graciously accepted.

6.  Scheduling makes me really excited.  Today I played around with trying to get better teachers, classes, and an awesome schedule for next semester, and after lots of stress emailing professors, I have a schedule for next semester that I am excited for.  I dropped a boring US History class for  "The Life and Teachings of Jesus," which fulfills my history requirement, and I am truly excited for this class.  Plus, an added bonus is that Michelle Lippoli and I will be in class together.  I like being friends with her.

mondays aren't always so bad

Highs of my day:

Cooking and baking with my friends Anne and Natalie for our Young Life leader, Summer, who just had her third baby girl, Alice Jane.  Both mom and baby are doing great, and were so excited for the treats we brought over.  I like doing these kind of things.  I like being helpful and caring for people.  Summer was beyond appreciative, which made me feel even better about helping her out.  She deserves it.

Something about babies just makes me in awe.  Holding baby Alice today was so peaceful.  She's so beautiful and tiny and intricate and innocent.  Holding her put this image in my head of God and me.  That God made every person to be beautiful and tiny and intricate and innocent, and that He holds us in his arms every single day.  I like that.

alice jane

Playing tennis with my doubles player from high school.  Maureen's still a senior, so it was good to catch up and reminisce about our glory days on the court.  With senior year comes all the crazy ups and downs, but she's been a trooper and stayed strong through it all.  I admire her strength.

first steps on the first days

New Year's Day, bright and early, Michelle, Maggie, and I took off on a roadtrip adventure to see Sarah Wright.  We were all so tired, and it was a super boring drive until we picked up McDonald's and started making interpretive dance vids.  I love that I had never officially met Maggie until this morning, but it was like we'd been friends for years.  God Bless Camp Tecumseh.

Maggie, Michelle, Molly, Sarah, Sarah, and I played mat snatchers and Just Dance 2 while our giant cupcake baked after eating at Noodles with camp friends.  My favorite part was "just being" with these amazing friends and making lists and doing devotions and reading Shauna Niequist.  We laughed and cried and smiled and scratched backs until the wee hours of the morning.

Making lists and talking forced me to think back on 2010, the good and the bad.  It was a fabulous year full of so much change, but it was still hard to think back.  I was just able to realize the things that I still need to deal with and figure out for the future.  I'm so thankful that I got to start out 2011 like this.

If I could live like this every day of my life, I would in a heartbeat.  Sarah said that camp living is what she thinks life is supposed to be.  I hope that as I continue blogging, I can find out what my definition of life is.

the cornerstone

So yes, I'm blogging.  I'm not blogging to be cool or popular or because I have nothing better to do.  I'm blogging because I want to make a change in my life, and I want to record everything.  I want a life I remember, and since my memory constantly fails me, I'm hoping this blog won't.  I want to want to write.  I want to love writing.  I want to be held accountable for reaching this goal and making this change.  I want to define my life.

The quote:

"Cause that’s what life's about.  It's about the times where you lay in the grass next to someone you love.  It's about the color of the sky.  It's about a roaring fire on a winter eve.  Everybody hurts, everybody bleeds.  Everyone laughs & smiles & loves.  & that's all that it is.  There's no meaning of life.  It's nothing that can be defined.  It's a matter of writing your own definition."

thanks hlw.

I want to define my life.  I want it to be uniquely mine.  I want my life to be defined by my words and actions, and not by what other people think of my words or actions.  When I make choices, I want to stop thinking, "Well if I do this, she'll tell him and he'll think that's stupid," or "I should do this because she did and I like her."  That's not me being true to myself.  That's me trying to please and be like other people.  I want to be the best version of myself always.  This will be a huge challenge for me, but I am so sure that it's exactly what I need.