Friday, May 27, 2011

i'm not very good at staying on topic. sorry.

Bad things really suck when they happen to you, but I've experienced lately that it's almost harder to watch bad things happen to someone else.  You just feel so weak and powerless as you watch someone else's world get rocked by something they never wanted to happen.  I always just think of a little kid asking why bad things happen, and the worst part is that nobody knows.  When I see my friends hurting, all I want is to sit and cry with them.  I know it doesn't make anything better, but I just hate seeing them suffering alone.  I struggle with this because a lot of times, people just want to be alone. They don't want help of sympathy from people, they just want answers.  I want to try to be more intentional about caring for others.  I want my friends to know that I'm always always there for them, even if they don't feel like they want anyone.  I want it to be natural and like second nature for me to go see a friend without them asking.  I want to not hesitate.  I want to not think twice.  I want to be there.
I don't have best friends, but I do love all of my friends more than they probably know.  If I'm friends with someone, we're really friends.  I really hate it when girls are friends with someone, but as soon as the friend leaves the room, the girl talks to the rest of her friends about how annoying and clingy and weird she is.  I love my friends and try my hardest to stick up for them.
It's weird how different friendships are different.
I really like being home with my sister.  And the rest of my family too.  But especially Michelle.  I wish she wasn't still in school so we could legit hang out, and not just sit around and study for her chemistry test.  I'm excited to spend this weekend with her with our extended family.  These are usually the times where we talk to each other the most, because we both get tired of being around everyone else.  I like her and she says funny things and I like her outlook on things.  She's presh mcgesh.

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